My Sister Mary

"Mary, Mary, quite contrary, how does your garden grow? With silver bells and cockleshells and pretty maids all in a row."

When I think back to when Mary and I were young, I don’t have many clear memories. Our sister June, who is 15 years older than Mary, says she remembers Mary’s birth vividly. She had to take two weeks off from school at Central High to help care for Mom and Mary. As a result, she failed Algebra—but she made straight A’s when she retook it the next year.

I was five when Mary was born. By the time she was five, I was ten. When she turned ten, I was already fifteen and dating my future husband. Because of that age gap, we didn’t do much together as children. Most of our shared activities involved Jim and Bill. I’m sure we did the usual things—walking to and from school, playing in the yard and woods, and spending time with neighborhood kids—but our deeper connection came later in life, after we were both married with children.

One standout memory from our youth involves Mary interrupting a conversation between James and me at church. James had just yawned, and pesky little Mary stuck her finger in his mouth. He was not amused and told her, “I’m going to knock a knot on your head that even Oral Roberts can’t take off.” (For context, Oral Roberts was a well-known healing evangelist at the time.)

I gave Mary a 16th birthday party and invited all her church friends. She was just starting high school when I graduated in 1961. I married in 1962; she graduated and married in 1966. Mary was a bridesmaid in my wedding, and I was her maid of honor.

The next few years are a bit of a blur. Mary’s husband, Stanley, was drafted into the Army and served in Kentucky, Arizona, and Oklahoma. Mary joined him in Oklahoma, but I’m unsure about the other locations. Meanwhile, I was raising my children—Pam was three and Byron was three months old when Mary married. James was attending UT, and I was working at Levi’s to support us.

After the Army, Stanley began a long career with Bell South and graduated with high honors from the University of Tennessee. I’m not writing their full biography, just enough to set the stage.

Mary’s first child, Melissa, was born in 1968. I already had two children by then. In 1971, both of us welcomed babies: Mary’s son Jonathan was born on April 2, and my daughter Jennifer on April 24. They were close for many years.

Mary and Stanley built a house off Millertown Pike on Mary Emily Lane. I remember her hosting a 25th wedding anniversary party there for June and Onloe—perhaps a makeup for June’s failed Algebra?

In 1977, Mary and Stan moved to Franklin, Tennessee, due to Stan’s job transfer. Melissa and Jonathan started school there. With the house empty during the day, Mary grew homesick. A man from their new church offered her a job at his coffee company. She took phone orders, packed boxes, and managed various office duties for about a year before applying to the phone company where Stan worked. She was hired into a clerical position and remained with the company for 16 years in various roles.

Mary and Stan were always good to my children. Each summer, they took them for extended visits. I could always trust their home—it was a strong Christian environment. One summer, Jennifer even went to Disney World with them. Jennifer was in Melissa’s wedding, and Melissa was in hers. Our kids remained close, and Mary and Stan’s example likely influenced Jennifer’s choice to attend a Christian college.

After about eight years in Franklin, they moved to Murfreesboro so their children could attend a Christian school. They lived there for six years. One of my favorite memories is a family reunion they hosted in Murfreesboro. We had a talent show—Josh tiptoeing through the tulips, Pat as the laundry woman, and a barbershop quartet made up of James, Stan, Charles, and Ron. It was a day full of food, laughter, and unforgettable fun.

As their kids graduated and went to college, Mary again felt homesick. In 1991, they moved back to Knoxville. Sadly, our mother passed away in December 1992, and Stan’s mother passed the following August. Although their return was marked with sorrow, it allowed them to spend precious time with their mothers before they passed.

Missy & Bruce Barker

Melissa met her husband, Bruce, at Pensacola Christian College. He was from Michigan. Jonathan met his wife, Angele, also at Pensacola; she was from North Carolina. So, for a few years, Mary and Stan were busy planning weddings.

Melissa and Bruce settled in Lake Odessa, Michigan, where Bruce pastors Faith Bible Baptist Church and leads Faith Christian School. Melissa serves as an administrative assistant and Christian counselor. Their children include Sarah Conilee (named for our mom), Maxwell, and Cassia. Sarah and her husband, Nathan, have a son, Benaiah Evans Barker Goodson. They all live and work in Pensacola. Maxwell is engaged and works at Camp CoBeAc. Cassia is currently attending Pensacola Christian College.

Jon & Angele Williams

Jonathan and Angele have four children: Caitlyn, Josh, Chase, and Marenda. Jonathan is now the senior pastor at Bluestone Baptist Church in Danielsville, Georgia. Angele is an executive consultant with Rodan + Fields. Caitlyn and her husband, Andrew, live in Phenix City, Alabama, with their son Tobias and a second child on the way. Josh and his wife, Devin, live in Foley, Alabama, where he pastors Crosspoint Baptist Church. Chase and his wife, Rachelle, are evangelists based in Georgia. Marenda is currently at Pensacola Christian College. Jonathan’s children are musically gifted—they’ve made CDs and sung in many churches, with Josh writing much of their music.

Stan retired from the phone company after more than 30 years. He and Mary moved to Pensacola to be near Melissa and her family. They worked at Pensacola Christian College—Stan for 18 years, Mary for 14. After five years, Bruce accepted a pastoral position in Michigan, but Mary and Stan remained in Pensacola.

Five of their seven grandchildren are now married. All of them attended Pensacola Christian College, giving Mary and Stan the joy of sharing in their college experiences.

Here is a closing message from Mary:

“Where have the years gone? Stan and I retired from public work in 2017. It’s already been five years, and time keeps flying by. We’re still busy with church, our kids, and their families. This year has been especially hard for our extended family. All three of my sisters have been very sick, and our oldest sister, June, passed away in June. That same day, my nephew Ronnie Lee also passed. Our hearts have been heavy. Nearly everyone in our family contracted COVID this year—some cases were worse than others. Despite it all, we’ve managed some travel: we finally made it out west to see the Grand Canyon, and we’ve visited Ruby Falls, Niagara Falls, Canada, and taken many short trips. We don’t travel as freely as we once did; old age is catching up to us. Still, the Lord has been so good to us. Life would be unbearable without His abiding presence. We look forward to whatever years He gives us yet to come.”